Teaching kids discipline has always either been controversial or too daunting a task to take on. The topic of the “discipline rod” has also added salt to the first. Society is still divided when it comes to the idea of using a “tool” or merely allotting consequences for wrong actions.
Parents in different parts of the world, in different cultures and religions, struggle with the same thing. The line between disciplining a child for the purpose of teaching him or her a lesson, and using discipline as an excuse to inflict harm sometimes gets blurred when not watched carefully. Of course, this is the much more extreme end of it. And this should ALWAYS, we cannot stress it more, it should ALWAYS be avoided.
What Is Positive Discipline?
Here’s a brief definition of what disciplining is: the practice of teaching, training and correcting people to do obey rules or to gain acceptable behavior. Positive discipline, on the other hand, uses the same backbone, only, it focuses on positive aspects of discipline and training.
Why Choose Positive Discipline?
The benefit of positive discipline is that it can be tailor-fitted for any child. Its main goal is to eventually teach self-discipline to him or her so that he or she will eventually have valuable character traits. Its end is to one day let them have that inner clock and conscience to choose to do what’s right. That, and to be able to take on responsibility proactively.
How To Do It
The question now is: how can one teach positive discipline? Where to begin? You don’t have to feel stressed about it. Learn the different ways to practice positive discipline.
What you need to constantly proactively practice is how to say something without uttering the words “no” or “don’t.” Studies have shown that the more parents use these terms, the more children want to challenge them and go against what they’re told not to do.
Positive Scripting And Playtime
Positive scripting is the way to go. Have it in mind that you are not to inflict punishment for punishment’s sake. You are trying to teach meaningful lessons to your children. Lessons that come from their hearts and minds as they grow up. Don’t be afraid to use “reward and consequences”. Just be careful not to use it as a crutch.
Use playtime. This is where you, mom and dad, can stretch your creativity. You can use books and workbooks to copy materials and games. You can also create your own. Ones that are tailor-fitted to you and your child. Then, incorporate lessons to be learned which you can talk about after.
Now, listen. Yes, listen. Let them have and feel that security to voice out their thoughts. And pay attention. Show them that you’re paying attention. Then, talk it out. Anger is never a solution to anything. Remember, it’s not about you. If they try to use tantrums and intimidation, don’t lose your cool. Don’t try to control them either.
Turn the tables around by reminding them of the benefits of doing the right thing and then what the rewards are for doing so. It will take much practice. Much trial and error. But it will always be worth your patience.
Also, never forget that quality should always be your priority. Nothing beats quality time with your kids.